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This Week in MLS - We've Got One Ticket To Paradise

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I am sick. So if you don't want to catch my germs, don't lean too close to your computer screen! I'm just kidding, you can't catch a virus over the internet. But your computer can. Think about that. 

Don't think about that, it's fever talk. 

First things first, Champions League. The crazy go nuts game is Toronto FC vs. FC Dallas. If either team wins, they clinch one of the two spots in Group C. Now, if they draw, FC Dallas would advance if Pumas get a result against Tauro FC. If Tauro wins, all four teams will finish tied, and the four coaches will stand in a circle and kick each other in the nuts. Last two standing advance.

Or head to head or  goal difference or whatever.

The Sounders match is much easier, since they already qualified. Cheeky buggers. 

Then Wednesday, Colorado goes up against Santos Laguna, and will advance with a win; or a draw between Isidro Metapan and Real Espana. 

The LA Galaxy are in the same boat. Win and you're in like sin. They can also advance with a draw if Alajuelense defeats Morelia. 

In MLS action, there's one spot left in the playoffs, and the New York Red Bulls, DC United, Chicago Fire, and Portland Timbers all have a shot. It's really complicated and my head feels like salami, but it's like a Battle Royal, where the Red Bulls just have to win without Thierry Henry and they're in. 

I really need to lie down. Chris Wondolowski is once again trying to steal the Golden Boot in the final week. So that's a thing to watch too. 

Signing off now, the action starts tonight with CCL action.